jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
