that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize