Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
My hand turned me down
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
