its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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