You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Randomize
