Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Randomize
