omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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