He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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