CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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