a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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