Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
My bed smells like the plague
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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