just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
