508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Randomize
