I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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