Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Naked. naked and bneed help.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
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