She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
