So drunk, too bad you don't want this
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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