I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
All I want is dick and wine.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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