You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
