he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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