I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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