BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Randomize
