At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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