brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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