So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
