Bisexual people are plain selfish.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
