This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Randomize
