we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
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