I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Randomize
