Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Randomize
