First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
