Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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