I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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