Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
