god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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