office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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