But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
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