Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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