I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
