Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Randomize
