Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize