You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize