Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Randomize