we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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