Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
