your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
