Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize