just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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