I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Randomize
