I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize
