I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
