Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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