Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize